DMovies - Your platform for thought-provoking cinema

All The Men I Met But Never Dated

Closeted queer Pakistani finds tender loving in the gym, in a short movie with a taste of more to come - from the Woodstock Film Festival

Mainstream cinema – in both the feature and short film variety – rarely centres on Muslim lives and stories. It’s even rarer to see a queer image of Muslim life uplifted on screen. All the Men I Met but Never Dated, the autobiographical short from Pakistani-American Muneeb Hassan, does just that. That’s something for which we should be grateful.

Ali (Ahmed Shihab-Eldin) spots a shirtless Oliver (Jared P-Smith) at the gym, who is so nice to look at that he wants a longer and closer view. The two go on a few dates, shown as a montage, before the fast-forwarding stops for their fourth date. That’s when Oliver pieces together that Ali has never come out of the closet to his family (and doesn’t show any intentions to). “I can’t be someone’s secret” he says, as friendly as possible, initiating their break-up. The most substantial scene in the brief 10 minutes is a sit-down conversation between the two men circling the complexities of love, familial responsibility, and cultural expectations as Ali voices his desire to keep his sexuality from his family.

The first few minutes rush without pause. What follows has little regard for time or space. Within a single minute, we endure a a complete whiplash of settings as the camera jumps from the gym, to a date, to Ali’s bedroom (without Oliver, so it is not a continuation of their date), and then to another date (or several). Nothing “happens” beyond establishing a connection between the men. It is difficult to emotionally attach to the characters when dropped right into a montage first date without meeting either of the partners beforehand. The problem is that this montage is clumsy and poorly assembled.

In what is essentially a two-person short, Shihab-Eldin and P-Smith prove they can carry their weight. They are also fascinating choices from Hassan (and casting director Hamzah Saman). While both have on-screen careers of some sort (Shihab-Eldin, who is American-Kuwaiti by way of Palestine, as a journalist; P-Smith as a model and actor), they are both arguably more well-known for their work as social media influencers. The former boasts more than a million followers on Instagram, and that’s thanks to his Palestinian work and activism. They are likely a glimpse into the future too. More and more shorts, early career features, and genre work will surely make use of influencer talent with the hopes of expanding the potential reach of a piece through casting. And for All the Men I Met but Never Dated, a story with a perspective rarely heard, a little amplification wouldn’t be so bad. At times, it feels like the film is unfinished. It leaves viewers asking for more!

All The Men I Met But Never Dated premiered in the Woodstock Film Festival.


By Joshua Polanski - 23-11-2024

Joshua Polanski is a freelance film and culture writer who writes regularly for the Boston Hassle and In Review Online, while also contributing to the Bay Area Reporter, and Off Screen amongst a varie...

DMovies Poll

Are the Oscars dirty enough for DMovies?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Most Read

Sexual diversity is at the very heart of [Read More...]
Just a few years back, finding a film [Read More...]
Forget Friday the 13th, Paranormal Activity and the [Read More...]
A lot of British people would rather forget [Read More...]
QUICK AND DIRTY: LIVE FROM TALLINN A candidate’s [Read More...]
Pigs might fly. And so Brexit might happen. [Read More...]

Read More

Just how did the Bafta winners get to Spain so quickly?

 

David Sanchez - 01-12-2024

British talent elevates the stage at the Aguilar de Campoo Short Film Festival of Northern Spain, reports David Sanchez live from the Iberian nation [Read More...]

ArteKino returns for a sultry European December!

 

DMovies' team - 01-12-2024

Europe's favourite online film festival is back this month with 12 European movies for you to watch entirely for free, and to warm you up just as the winter begins to bite! [Read More...]

Amanda

Carolina Cavalli
2022

Paul Risker - 01-12-2024

Charmingly idiosyncratic Italian comedy about a filthy rich and socially inept young woman never fails to delight - watch it for free this December only with ArteKino 2024 [Read More...]